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Random Confession

ER Strangeness

I am a retired physician so this”weird thing” may not be for sensitive viewers!

I was working in an ER in rural Wisconsin when a very pregnant woman came in with pseudo contractions. Now, I've delivered over 300 babies in my career, done thousands of pelvic exams, and have had my fare share of sexual partners but this woman had the weirdest looking vulva I have ever seen. It looked like a steel trap with skin. Didn't snap shut like one though.

Okay, that's weird in itself. When the real contractions started she had her husband drive her to a city 30 miles away instead of coming to our hospital. She delivered in the front passenger seat less than half way there. He called 911 and EMT's came, took the newborn to the city hospital, and brought her to my ER. I asked her why she didn't come here in the first place. She said that she didn't want the on call doc (a local family physician) to deliver the baby because their previous baby died and this doc had delivered it.

I also asked where her husband was. She replied that he was cleaning up the mess in the truck!

Now, ready for something even weirder? The next shift I asked this physician about the previous infant who died. He told me that the poor child was born anencephalic, meaning without a brain. All the poor guy had was a brainstem which means all of his motor skills and reflexes were intact but on autopilot. Death was guaranteed.

Weirdest part: the family doctor told me that the reason for this birth defect was because the woman's biological dad was the father!

Have a nice day, everybody.
anonymous Miscellaneous October 14, 2020 at 12:13 pm 0

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